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Thursday, July 22, 2010

Mr. Smoochy Cries "FOUL!"

Being the mother of a 15 yr old male is an interesting roller coaster. Any preconceived notions or rigid agendas should be left at the door...along with your sanity. I've had "the talk" with Conner too many times to count. We've talked about almost every subject under the sun, in meticulous detail...some conversations more awkward than others. But we've managed to address all of his inquiries honestly and directly. Along with the importance of sexual health, I also try to impart the personal values that we feel Conner should have for himself as a growing young man. The world that he lives in is MUCH more liberal and in-your-face than the world his father and I knew during our growing up years. The word SCARY would be a good place to start.

I have often wondered if these sporadic dialogues ever sink in. If they give him pause for thought as he navigates the wonders of teen hood. Does he ever take my words seriously, or am I just full of hot air? Am I an over exaggerator who takes things waaay too seriously? Hmmm....let's examine this a little further, shall we?

It's 2010, school's out for summer (sing the song if you must), and Conner has a new girlfriend. Not a shocker. As soon as I learn one girlfriend's name, the wind changes and he has a new one. It's been this way since 6th grade. ANYWAY, *sweetie* was the new honey and he was really excited about her. They talked on the phone, texted, saw eachother at the neighborhood pool - pretty tame stuff. As his birthday came around the two of them started cooking up a plan to go do something together, so we agreed to let him go to the local water park with *sweetie* and her family for the day. They had a great time, it was fun, blah blah blah.

Move forward about two days.

Conner's phone has started blowing up with text messages. He couldn't fire off one text without another one chiming in while he was typing - complete insanity! Not only was the texting about to put me over the edge, but he seemed to be on a pretty short fuse that day as well. I finally had to put my foot down and tell him to turn it off and hand the phone over. I am an admitted text-a-holic myself, but his phone was rolling in texts like a slot machine?!? Enough is enough. As we started digging into the cause of the commotion, Conner was really honest about it all, and said that he had broken up with *sweetie* because "all she wants to do is make out, and I want to do other things with my time besides just that".

WOW!

I couldn't believe my ears! After all of our talks about making good choices, respecting girls even if they happen to be saying "YES", the whole kit-n-caboodle...HE SAID NO?!? I was sooooo proud!...still am! Apparently he has been listening, and made a really honorable choice even though it wasn't the "popular" thing to do.

I love this boy so much. He definitely drives me crazy. He knows precisely how to push my buttons when the mood strikes him. But when he looks at me with that quirky smug grin, my heart clenches up into my throat and the tears start to sting. Just once I wish that he could get a glimpse of the crazy mad love that I have for him.

Mama Kat's Writers Workshop:

Prompt#3 - We talk about mother's guilt a lot...who needs it? Describe a good mom moment!





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7 comments:

Angelia Sims said...

Now THAT is a great mom moment. It is so refreshing to hear a boy stand up for himself. Love the boundaries you instilled. Good job, Mom!

Gina said...

Great story...and good job! I worry about that having a young son (14 months).

Jennifer said...

Great mom moment! I need to get some tips... I need to be armed when Noah asks questions.

C.Mom said...

Wow!!! What is a great mom moment...you should be proud! Given how my daughter already flirts with boys (and she is only 5)--I worry about the teenage years! following you back from Mama Kat :)

Missy@Wonder, Friend said...

Hi - I saw your comment on The Red Dress Club and just wanted to come by to check out your blog.

I loved this post. My guys are still little, and the thought of teenagers terrifies me, but you eased my mind a bit. Connor sounds like a great kid - be proud!

Kristen T. said...

***Beautiful*** mom moment. You must have wanted to burst out and scream "I have the best son EVER!"

Wendy said...

Your writing is so wonderfully relatable, I have a 22 yr. old son who reminds me so much of Conner (love the name btw) and somehow I think a mother's guilt for not giving her child this and that doesn't vanish so easily, no matter what age they are. But,it seems that you instilled Conner with a great self-esteem which is so hard for a 15 year old boy. I also talked to my son about "the birds and the bees" as Mrs. Cleaver would have said and how Conner reacted shows he will truly respect and cherish women as more than just an object. You've given him that basis, good for you!