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Thursday, September 9, 2010

Life's Just Not The Same After Kids


Prompt #1 - A list of things you no longer have in common with your single/childless friends...and why you love them anyways.
  1. I buy my clothes for function rather than fashion.
  2. Catching projectile vomit in your hands isn't gross, it's a skill that accomplishes two things at once - reduces the amount of clean-up required, and increases eye/hand coordination.
  3. Air freshener in the bathroom isn't just to cover the smell of a stinky poo...it also helps to mask the odor created by boys that have problems AIMING.
  4. Sanity is relative.
  5. iCarley is a little more entertaining as time passes. Sad, I know.
  6. My kitchen table isn't set with a centerpiece, placemats, chargers, and napkin rings anymore. It has paint, scratches, dried syrup, and marker stains on it...and I like it that way.
  7. My DVD drawer has more kid DVD's than adult movies. And by "adult" I mean PG-13 and R....not porn.
  8. Baby wipes are like a happy package of magic no matter how old my kids get...not just for baby shower gifts.
  9. My idea of a clean car was flushed down the toilet when Conner started drinking from a sippy cup and there was enough food under the seat to feed a third world country.
  10. Cooking dinner is rarely an option, it's a requirement.
  11. This weekend I washed 2 loads of darks, 1 load of neutrals, 1 load of whites, 1 load of reds, 1 load of towels only, 1 load of green/blues, and 2 loads of sheets. Beat THAT, Single Sally!
  12. My ass. The kids did this to me. Honestly, they did.
  13. Saving money is usually short term rather than long term. What I save inevitably goes towards Christmas gifts, upcoming plans, or for the kid's birthdays.
  14. Richard says that I have "mom hair", but I really don't give a rip. I can put it in a ponytail, up in a clip, or blow it out. FUNCTION is the name of my game, and I need something easy.
  15. My carpet stains tell a story of our life with growing children...spilled syrup, sippy cups, markers, playing with make-up, etc.
Some days I envy the quiet, solitude, cleanliness, leisure, and uninterrupted lifestyle that others have. But then my redhead barges into the room crying because he fell off of his bike. Or Abby adds ANOTHER item to the list of things that she wants to have at her birthday party (that she's been planning for 9 months so far). Or Conner tells me that he has a project due tomorrow for a major grade...and everything is how it should be.

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14 comments:

Jackie said...

I don't think I could have written it any better! Great post!

Amanda said...

Great post!!!!! Even though I don't have kids yet you're spot on!!!!!

Amanda said...

Aww! I love the statement about the carpet stains. You make it sound sweet. And who cares about mom hair? Once you reach a certain age, I think that just happens!

Jennifer said...

So my kid isn't the only one that plans her birthday party a year in advance? Does your invite EVERYONE she meets?

Anonymous said...

Such a great post! :) I envy people with babies, but I'm trying to learn to enjoy all the things I won't have when I have kids.. :) Like sleep, and free time, haha.

Stopped in from Mama Kat.

Jill said...

Great post. Made me laugh today because I could relate! LOL Have a great day!!
Blessings,
Jill

Anonymous said...

Nicely put... And I am also now entertained by iCarly... not sad.

Deanna said...

Love it! I am quite entertained by Mickey Mouse in the mornings, and I'm not ashamed (much!). : )

Stopping by from Mama Kat's.

Meant to be Mom said...

Great post! Ahhh...carpet stains, carseat stains, clothes stains....the life of a mom. The worst part, I consider a shirt with only a "few" stains totally presentable in public- beat that single Sally :-) I am now a follower!

Jennifer said...

Wow.. that's a lot of laundry. Hilarious post and Abby sounds like Noah. He's a planner. At least you have plenty of notice.

Stef said...

Hahaha. The iCarly comment had me rolling. I usually watch the iCarly marathons...with my kids.
YOu are hilarious!

Sandra said...

I laughed when I read that you're finding iCarley more entertaining as time goes by. I feel the same way about Wizards of Waverley Place.
You are so thoroughly enjoyable.
I'm off to catch up on more of your posts.

Jen said...

This was a great post. There is just something about that list that I totally love. Maybe its because, that is my life right now. ;)

BusyMom said...

Thanks for your comments on my Dream Home... I was going to choose the one you did but then... when I was proof-reading it I got so darn depressed a bottle of wine seemed like a good idea... until I realized the last bottle got used by my 21 year old son for his girlfriend' going away party AND... the box-o-wine in the garage fridge was empty:(is it too much to expect someone to throw it out when all used up???apparently...
So I decided to write about my home- the one I love and that always makes me happy just by turning onto my 350 foot gravel private lane... add a cuppa joe and a comfy chair on the deck watching the hummingbirds fly around my planters and... still wish I had wine, but buh-bye! depression!
And I can wear whatever I want with my bed-head hair on my deck or jump in my pool in my pjs and not feel guilty! :)